There are many fish in the sea…but are any of them normal?

(Picture from ABC.com)

The new season of The Bachelorette has started and Ali from last season’s The Bachelor is back, except this time around she is the one handing out the roses. The first episode is always entertaining to me… it’s like watching men at a bar with no game hit on the hot chick. It’s awkward and embarrassing and highly amusing all at the same time. The sad thing is you know that these men had plenty of time to come up with something funny, clever, or intelligent to say… and what we saw was the best they had. Yeesh.

Some of the most memorable entrances included jumping out of the moon roof of the limo, doing a back flip off the top of the limo (after pretending to get out of the wrong door…soooo funny), and the always trusty “reel her in” move where the guy pretends to be fishing and attempts to hook the girl and reel her in (yes, someone actually did this). I must say though one of the most awkward introductions was when one of they guys got out of the limo in cowboy boots, pausing to make sure that Ali took them in, which she did. Getting the reaction he wanted, the guy proceeded to tell Ali he wore them special for her cause he remembered her getting out of the limo on the first night to meet Jake (previous bachelor) with her cowboy boots and they had that in common. Slightly confused but willing to laugh it off Ali told him that she never wore cowboy boots and that wasn’t her. I mean come on guy, at least do your fact checks before trying something like this…now you look like a total douche and this most definitely was the reason you were not given a rose.

Most cringe worthy moment of the show? That would go to Derrick AKA “Shooter”. When introducing himself to Ali he told her he was known as “Shooter” and he would explain the nickname and tell her his real name inside. I am still trying to figure out his strategy with this, I mean, if it was a funny or cute story okay maybe…but when you tell a girl you just met and are trying to impress that you got your nickname cause you were with a girl in college and you prematurely… you know… well not sure what you hoped to accomplish…not getting a rose?... Done! Then to top it off Shooter looked like he was going to cry during his exit interview and got mad he wasn’t picked and stormed off… what a winner. I’m sure the girls will be lining up at home cause who wouldn't want a cry baby, tantrum throwing, one minute man?

Out of the guys there were definitely some odd ducks. I was happy to see that Ali sent a lot of them packing. I was especially happy to see the outdoorsy guy who has killed one of every animal on earth go… and I wish she would have sent the Craigs home too. Craig M seems like an arrogant jerk and Craig R. is so insecure that as soon as he saw a chance to throw another guy under the bus (wrestler Justin)…he jumped at the chance. Plus that whole thing with the converse key chain was just too cheesy for me… “I got you one to keep and one for me…and maybe someday we can make them a pair”…give me a break.

This season looks full of drama as usual. Sounds like one of the guys is hiding that he has a girlfriend at home (not the first time)…and Kasey seems to have some emotional issues that have the other guys thinking he may not be able to handle rejection (not to mention the previews make it look like he attempts to cut one of his wrists). At this point my front runner would have to be Ty from Booneville, MS. A guy that loves his dog that much is good guy in my book and Jesse from Peculiar, MO is a close second just because he is cute. Overall I think Ali made some good choices…and to be honest… she should be thankful her and Jake didn’t work out.

I now return you to your regularly scheduled life.

High School Anyone?

(picture from msn.com)

Whenever I watch an episode of "The Real Housewives", I feel like I have gone back to high school (but with rich middle aged women that have an unending supply of designer high heels, spray tans, and dinner parties). The housewives of New York City more so then any other, with their catty comments, sabotage, and other "mean girl" behavior.

Jill (second from the left) is the worst offender. If you're on Jill's "side" she is your best friend, full of compliments, invitations, and gossip to share. If however, you should even dream of disagreeing with her, or make the mistake of leaving her off the guest list, beware. She resorts to immature behavior like trying to get as many of your friends/acquaintances to join her in blacklisting you. Even if it means recruiting people she previously couldn't stand, if they agree to dislike you, then they are in (for the moment). Oh and any dirty laundry you might have had or ammunition you may have given her in the past... take cover...it's coming out and she will tell anyone who will listen (newspapers, psychics, you name it). All the while she plays the victim, acting like she is only doing this because you hurt her so deeply (by disagreeing/not including her). Jill's friends should understand that with her "friendships are like bank accounts" deposits are welcomed... withdrawals are frowned upon.

Deputy Mean Girl and Jill's henchman (until she stops kissing butt) is LuAnn (far left). LuAnn is eating up being bffs with Jill now that Bethany has been kicked to the curb. Poor Bethenny had the nerve to become successful, get a book deal, and get a boyfriend and not properly credit Jill for whatever small part she may have played by being her friend, but we'll cover Bethenny later. LuAnn is recently divorced from a Count (fancy huh?) and appears to get off on all things that make her appear more important then she is. Fancy European air kisses?... You betcha ya (and if you only give one, she will demand a second). Introduce her to someone she feels is lower class...say a cabbie... prepare to be reprimanded. Leave off her title of Countess when introducing or addressing her?...How dare you!!! She comes off as one of the more pretentious housewives (that's an accomplishment) but she will take her jabs and insult you with a smile and laugh (just ask the little girl who was part of LuAnn's charity work for underprivileged girls who said she wanted to be a model when she grew up and was told by the Countess that she had time to lose the weight).

The target of Jill and LuAnn's two women army at the moment is Bethenny. Bethenny is probably my favorite housewife. She's funny, she's successful (by her own merit) and she will tell it like it is in a heartbeat (she called "the countess" a snake to her face). She recently got engaged and found out she was pregnant. News you would normally share with your best girl friend, but upon returning from her book tour she found out she no longer had one. Bethenny apparently made the mistake of not crediting Jill enough in her success or didn't invite her on a trip she was going on, or something unforgivable like that. In return Bethenny left a peeved message that Jill is now playing for anyone who will listen to get them on her side. Can I understand Jill's feelings being hurt...yeah. But to blacklist your best friend without really even talking to her about why you are mad, or trying to work it out, I don't get it. Since their falling out they have had a couple of face to face encounters where Jill acts like she is too distraught to talk. That, or Jill finds excuses to avoid Bethenny for as long as possible before they finally are face to face and she proceeds to act fakely happy and like nothing is wrong.

As for the other three housewives they have kind of taken a backseat this season. Romona (second from the right) is big into "renewal" (new hair, renewing vows) and is as crazy as ever. She insults the other housewives one minute and is hugging them the next. The funniest thing she has done so far this season is telling another housewife , Kelly, that her boobs were lopsided and then didn't get why Kelly would be insulted. Oh Romona.

Shockingly Kelly (third from right) has been fairly normal this season or maybe she is just being out shined by the other levels of crazy distracting the viewers. She still seems kind of clueless though and thinks that by repeating things multiple times she makes a good argument..No no no and Seriously? Seriously? seem to be favorites (or maybe all the spray tanning fumes are going to her brain).

Finally there's Alex (far right) who I would have to say is the most down to earth of the housewives, at least this season. Alex is the girl in high school that is friendly with everyone both inside and outside of her clique. She is laying low, or as low as one can, with a husband that wears fuchsia loafers. She doesn't seemed swayed by the other housewives and their pettiness. Alex stands up for herself when she needs to and seems genuine in her interactions with all the housewives, good or bad.

These women, their lifestyles, and shenanigans make for good TV. Anyone who misses the brutality of high school or remembers why they are glad to be done with it, need only tune into Bravo at 10:00 PM (EST) to get their fix.

I now return you to your regularly scheduled life.

Fresh Meat 2 - The Turkey vs. The Hot Dog

(Picture from MTV. Wes on left, Kenny on right)

MTV's Challenges, Duels, and Fresh Meat shows are probably some of my most favorite Reality TV shows out there. I wish I could say it was because they are thought provoking or creative, but no, I enjoy the the fighting, hooking up, back stabbing, and the desperateness of the cast in general.

This season it's Fresh Meat 2. I guess MTV thought it was time to add some new faces into the mix since past casts are getting older, and you would hope moving on with their lives (some don't seem to have that anywhere in their plans though). And although each season has it's drama with alliances, exes, and betrayals... this season the house is pretty clearly divided from the start. You have Wes (the turkey) and Kenny (the hot dog).

Let's start with Wes. Wes talks a big game and acts tough, he wears a necklace with mini brass knuckles to prove it damn it! I am convinced though that Wes was a dork growing up...probably got picked on alot and has low self esteem. To hide his insecurities he works out alot to look like a muscle head and talks a bunch of crap, but when backed into a corner or antagonized, he usually backs down (after alot of chest beating and yelling). So what's his beef (haha) with Kenny you might ask? Well Wes used to be engaged to Johanna but that didn't end up working out too well (shocker). After their break up, Johanna went on MTV's The Island and ended up hooking up with Kenny, who at the time was somewhat friends with Wes. So I can kinda see why Wes is mad...but for some reason the anger is directed at Kenny and not Johanna (who by the way I think he would take back in a second if she showed any interest). Since then Wes has been out for blood.

Kenny, who refers to himself as "Mr. Beautiful", is totally full of himself (in case his self anointed nick name didn't give that away) and seems to find amusement in getting under other people's skin, which Wes totally lets him do. I don't think that Kenny saw Johanna as anything other then another conquest and if I was her, I would be a little embarrassed (she totally threw herself at him) but girls can't seem to help themselves. This season Theresa pretty much offered herself up to Kenny too but he turned her down and sent her running to Wes. This only fueled Wes' hatred when he found out that once again, Kenny had his girl, or could have, and Kenny didn't hesitate to rub his sloppy seconds in Wes' face the first chance he got.

So the house is pretty divided. And for once Kenny doesn't seem to be fairing too well. He is used to having his friends Evan and Johnny Bananas around to help him bully people and strategize. Kenny is pretty much on his own this time, especially since he lost Paula on Wednesday night. I'm curious to see if he has enough smarts, to go along with his looks, to keep him in the game.

This weeks episode wasn't as good as I was hoping for. The preview set expectations that Jenn was going to punch Mandi, but it was just a tease, and she really just hit the cup Mandi was holding in front of her face (damn). Every season seems to have at least one good brawl though, so I am still holding out hope.

One thing I did find highly amusing this week was when Wes, who thinks he is like an evil genius, thought that it was a good idea to put Mandi on his back for a challenge where you had to swing on branches suspended above water and get to the other side. He held on for all of two seconds on the first branch before falling (which is worse then any other team).

Also funny, during the exile challenge, Paula who weighs all of 75lbs dripping wet was kicking her partner's butt. Her partner tried out to be a freaking Navy Seal!!! (I guess we can see why he didn't make it). With Paula gone... I don't see things going well for Kenny unless him and Lauren (his partner) can keep winning the team challenges.

What do you think of the season so far? Are you team Wes or team Kenny?

I now return you to your regularly scheduled life.

Hairy Situation

(Picture from The CW)

Was anyone else having nightmares last night after watching Top Model? Between the pimped out Oompa Loompa "Weaven Steven" and the Sasquatch dresses, that's the stuff night terrors are made of...

I thought last nights episode had some pretty amusing scenes. For starters, during the runway challenge at the drag queen bar, Alexandra mentioned that she had alot of pressure on her since she "fell completely off the stage" during her last runway walk. She didn't elaborate to include that during that same challenge she also fell halfway down a flight of stairs during her entrance, or that a loud scream accompanied her falling off the stage. Maybe the trauma has made her memory fuzzy or perhaps she thought we wouldn't remember (I know I wasn't the only one who hit rewind atleast once!).

Then there was the horribly awkward moment when the judges were choosing the winner of the runway challenge by a clap-o-meter. All the girls were getting some sort of applause... even Clydesdale clomping Alexandra (who disappointingly managed to stay standing) and the not very memorable Jessica. Then they call Anslee's name and...... nothing....dead silence... (they should have super imposed some cricket noises for affect). It was one of those moments where someone else's embarrassment actually makes you uncomfortable.

Moving on. I think my favorite scene of the night was when Alasia was running late and all the girls headed down to the limo without her. Alasia, after finishing primping, walks to the elevator and pushes the button. She stands for a bit. No elevator. Then she tries the always trusted, but never works, tactic of continually pushing the button in a rapid fire manner. Still nothing. At this point I think most people would have thought to use the stairs... some maybe sooner... but nope, not Alasia. She seeks confirmation from the cameraman that they indeed too see that the elevator is not coming. Finally they cut to Alasia making her way down the stairs (I'm pretty sure she didn't come up with this idea herself) and she is saying "Oh I've never been down this way before... I'm scared", because you know, the Top Model house is probably a very dangerous place (maybe she thought Weaven Steven might jump out at any moment... that would strike fear in anyone's heart).

Krista ended up winning best picture this week... I think she is pretty but she needs a sandwich, maybe two. I am always shocked at which pictures the judges end up liking. Like when Angelea's picture came up, I was horrified (I may have even let out a screech) and I thought for sure she would get a bad critique. I mean she looked like a woolly mammoth being held at gun point or maybe Weaven Steven smiled (with his mouth full of gold teeth) and surprised her... okay I'm done with that now... I promise.

Next week the girls head to New Zealand and it's time for the "Go Sees". Since finding the stairs seems to be in issue for some...it should be entertaining. I am curious to see how goes next. I'm thinking it might be Alexandra's time. Do you have any thoughts on who might win? Anyone you can't wait to see gone? I'd love to hear your opinions.

I now return you to your regularly scheduled life.

You're Fired!

(Picture from MSN.Com and NBC)

Okay I apologize in advance that my posts might be a day or two behind when the shows actually air. That's the downfall of DVRs... they allow you to fall behind and offer too many choices...you can never say that nothing is on. Anyway... in the future I will try and post closer to the actual airing.

One of my guilty pleasures is Celebrity Apprentice, and even though Mr. Trump is always saying that his show is #1, it isn't, but don't argue with the man. Most people probably deny watching but I know I am not the only one (but you can continue to pretend not to). I thoroughly enjoy watching "has beens" and "never really were" celebrities compete in challenges that take them out of their elements, embarrass them, and of course the drama (and it's all in the name of charity so that makes everything okay...right?).

Sunday night was no exception. Lets start with the women. Cyndi Lauper was in her element as the task had to do with making over a singer to market them in a different way. Cyndi went directly into "take charge" mode and pretty much told all the other women to take a backseat and shut up... which Holly and Maria did not appreciate. And although Cyndi was kind of being rude I think that Holly and Maria were being childish and maybe not so smart. Cyndi, after all, was project manager and if she makes all the decisions and takes on all the responsibility then she also takes the fall. It didn't end up mattering though because Cyndi, nice or not, won the challenge for the women.

Now, let's move on to the poor men. Geez... they are down to two men vs. the five women after last nights episode. Goldberg apparently has issues with both numbers and making a good argument for himself (he should stick to fighting with his fists and the occasional folding metal chair). When asked about his roll as Project Manager he openly admitted to delegating 95% of the work to Brett (he apparently lacks the foresight to see that this could and would be used against him). When Don Jr. and Mr. Trump pointed out that 95% was ALOT... Goldberg changed his answer to 87% (so much better) and then later lowered it to 75% (he still didn't seem to get it). When asked who should be fired he threw Brett under the bus but Trump wasn't having it, pointing out that Goldberg should never have even taken the lead on this one as it was obviously a task more suited for Brett.

The funniest part, I thought, was when Trump said to Brett that he didn't know what he had going on under his bandanna (to which Brett looked pissed) but that maybe they should have put a bandanna on their client. And in true Trump fashion he wouldn't let it go, continuing to make bandanna comments until Trace Adkins (guest judge) said "Enough with the bandanna!".

So Goldberg and his non-mathematical self got the boot and it looks like next week the teams will be mixed up to even the playing field. The next task has to do with an exercise class that turns into a bump and grind Britney Spears video. Should be fun.

I now return you to your regularly scheduled life.